Contagious Idiocy

[catsidhe]

Some people are idiots. But that's alright, I'm more or less resigned to this. The problem is, however, that some idiots then go and make their idiocy contagious.

Let me just try and summarise this 'argument'.

• Beowulf includes monsters.
  
• These monsters were obviously dinosaurs.
  
• The Bible story of Noah implies says that dinosaurs were on the Ark, and only died out later.
  
• Therefore Beowulf is literally true in all its details. QED.

Are you as ... stunned by their line of reasoning as I am?

Oh, even better:

• Beowulf is true. Because it talks about dinosaurs. Well, it doesn't call then dinosaurs, but we all know what they meant. (See above)
  
• Beowulf, Hroðgar, Scyld Scefing, and all the others were mentioned in Beowulf,
  
• Therefore the people mentioned in Beowulf were all real people. QED.

Furthermore,

• Germanic fictional literature did not mention real people in fictional contexts. [I'd love to see their research which proves this. Ed.]
  
• Because all the people mentioned in Beowulf were real, that is further evidence that Beowulf is a true story.

Isn't that so wonderfully circular? It's beautiful, in its own sick way.


Or, if all that 'reasoning' hurts your head too much, how about this executive summary:

Beowulf is literally true in every detail because the Bible is literally True in every detail. QED.

And this article is meant for people who are homeschooling their children.


We are so doomed as a species.

(via MedievalStudies)

---

EDIT This was, daft as it was, merely second-hand bullshit.

Here and here are where you can sample the undiluted bullshit, straight from the tap, as it were.

Comments

And this surprises you in what way?

[collateral-damage-man.videntity.org (from livejournal.com)]

Given that the first thing I saw on that page was a pseudo-popup with a banner proclaiming the site to be "The Intersection of Faith & Life".

I swear the people heard the warning bells in about a 20k radius.

Now, where did I leave my cluebat...?

Re: And this surprises you in what way?

[sjl.livejournal.com]

The hell with the cluebat. Nuke 'em from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

Who said I was surprised?

[catsidhe.livejournal.com]

Like I said to someone in medievalstudies, I'm not anti-Christian, I'm anti-Idiot.

They're allowed to be Christian. They're allowed to talk about how their faith intersects with their everyday lives. They're allowed to discuss History and Literature in the context of their faith.

It's just that they should use reasoning at least as good as, or better than, what I expect from my three-year-old daughter in order to do so.

And I reserve the right to point at them and laugh when they don't.

[tcpip.livejournal.com]

I'm going to cut-n-paste this and post it to convert_me.

[catsidhe.livejournal.com]

Go nuts.

Get this bit!!

[wizard-foots.livejournal.com]

No English kings or events are mentioned. This shows that the poem was written before the Saxons, Geats, and other tribes migrated to England.

Oh I LOVE that one. Actually, you turkeys, it was written down in the early 11th century. But what's 500 years or so when you are a Bible-belt loony? Dearie me.....

If only that were the least of it...

[catsidhe.livejournal.com]

Beowulf was born in the Middle Ages, A.D. 495,

What, no date? Not "June 12, 495", or something? I'm disappointed.

Only one manuscript of the original poem exists. People found it, partly burned, in England about five hundred years after Beowulf lived.

1) So 495 + 500 = 995, so presumably the scribe was the one who found it. Burned.
2) "What Cotton fire?" 1731, ring a bell? "No."

The main monster in the story of Beowulf is Grendel. That is capitalized as though it is a proper name like Fido or Black Beauty. But it was a species of serpent. People spoke of grendels pond or grendels pit or grendels wood, naming them according to where they lived. Grendel in the story was a grendel mere because he lived in a large brackish pond full of coarse ferns. He probably had a loud, deep-throated growl. Hints about that are an ancient word grindill that means to bellow, and a Middle English word grindel that means angry.

Grendel lived in Denmark.

Hang on... weren't we just discussing how the grendels were a type of wyrm dinosaur, not a given name? Shouldn't you have said "The Grendel"? And as to it's being a genera rather than a proper name (with distinctive sub-species, yet!), strange that it isn't mentioned in any other works in Anglo-Saxon. Not one. Where did that detail come from then?

And "grindill"? Clark-Hall gives

+grind n. impact, crash.
±grindan³ (y) to rub together, grate, scrape
grinde f. shingle
grindel m. nap. grindlas bar, bolt. pl. grating, hurdle

Hmm. Nothing about bellowing there, or even making noise. Or being angry. Maybe there is a Middle English word "grindel" I don't know about, I'll just look it up. *google* *google* *google*
Oh.
Oh, my. I think I just found this dropkick's source material.


It's second-hand ignorant dreck this tool is peddling. It really was too much to expect independant thought, as broken as it was.

*sigh*.

[araquel.livejournal.com]

Considering the writer of "Beowulf & The Dinousaurs" can't even get it right with regards to who killed the dragon, I'm inclined to treat the rest of their scholarly efforts with some suspicion.