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83. Must not start any SITREP (Situation Report) with “I recently had an experience I just had to write you about….”
—— The 213 things Skippy is no longer allowed to do in the U.S. Army
—— The 213 things Skippy is no longer allowed to do in the U.S. Army
So. Tomorrow I find myself double-booked. I am to come in early to be in one building at 9:00 am sharp (under some scornful pressure — to the point that I suspect a level of punishment is involved) to begin the task of unpacking a lab's worth of computers ready for set-up and ghosting, and appear to also be invited to a meeting at 9:30 sharp, to investigate why three entire labs in another building are, in fact, not fit for purpose, and presumably to receive an implicit bollocking from several directions for not having done it right, or quickly enough, despite my doing the entire fucking building — seven lab's worth so far, five to go, across four separate VLANs, with new and mostly unconfigured switches, with an image which is still being modified by the academics — effectively all by myself. (Just as Bruce and Thomas have done OE, and Howard has done SEECS, and M has done all two dozen machines in Geo.) I suspect, but can't prove at the moment, that there are more machines in my building and under my responsibility than there are in the rest of the school. Oh, and the ghost server itself turns out to be flaky. I'm on my second Abbotsford Invalid (shut up, I'm not normally a big drinker), and considering turning up tomorrow bright and early and still drunk.
Friday, I spent the day first finalising the special image which I spent stripping down from 45GB by removing six packages and 12GB, so as to fit it on machines with 40GB hard drives. These are the aforementioned unfit-for-purpose machines. I then spent most of the rest of the day discovering that stuff needed to be fiddled with in the server before anything would happen, talked to a sysad and, after he figured out what needed to be done, and did it, proceeded to discover that one of the labs was even older than we thought, and did not have the correct network drivers, which I had to install one by one by hand, then finish off the configuration, and eventually left a bit before a quarter to nine at night. Thomas himself has worked over several weekends, so it has been suffering shich has been distributed. But still, doing all the labs in my building, after having almost single-handedly built the damn aforementioned 45GB image in the first place, on my own, has been an exhausting, deathmarch slog. And, I expect, largely thankless.
Wah wah wah, my life suxxors wah wah wah fuck.
Also, I wonder at my hearing. Last time I was tested, the last time I wondered at it, I tested with perfectly adequate hearing.
And yet, and yet... it struck me again today that my hearing may be perfectly good (and thanks to education from an early age on the damage that can be done, probably better than many of my age), but yet I really suck at the sort of filtration that everyone else seems to take for granted. I call it ‘Cocktail Party Deafness’, after the ‘Cocktail Party’ effect, whereby a person can pick out one conversation out of many, and if some attention is drawn, may do so retrospectively. I can sort of do that, but it's hard. Very hard. Picking one conversation out from any distracting noise I find difficult to a fault, and if the distractions are other conversations, then it can become damn near impossible. At the fish-and-chip shop indeed, I could barely figure out what the lass serving was saying over the radio playing. No-one else seemed to have a problem. I tend to do a lot of contextual extraction to get the gist of a conversation, and I'm not sure that it is normal to need to do so as much as I do. I don't have a problem with single sources, it does not seem to be a problem with the physical apparatus, but with the filtering mechanism. And I don't know that there is anything to be done about it but continue to cope. Or whatever. I don't even know if there is anything wrong.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-15 11:22 am (UTC)Thanks.
Date: 2009-03-15 11:39 am (UTC)It's just a long hard slog, but usually we're able to start earlier, and don't have to start from absolute scratch, and don't have to install tens of gigs worth of stuff we've never seen before, and don't have to set up the network as we go, and don't have to have everyfuckingthing installed everywhere.
It is at this stage, alas, not really something that I can sensibly ask for help for. But being allowed to just fucking get on with it might be nice. And not have Thomas giving me shit “Oh, nice of you to join us, what is your excuse for being late today...” Fuck off Thomas. I'm getting to the point that if he tries that shit on again I won't just give him the usual look, I'm telling him to fuck off to his face.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-15 12:05 pm (UTC)I've read that 20% of the population experiences this, and the science behind the what and why is advancing but the wider population are still not very aware of it. I don't know of any way to cope with it except to avoid trying to converse in noisy "social" environments.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-15 07:58 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-15 09:04 pm (UTC)I have also had occasions (including one christmas dinner) where the overload made me almost shut down. Everyone shouting over everyone else, and all I can hear is a roar filled with sounds that almost have meaning, but which I can't hear enough of to make any of it out.
Distinctly unpleasant, that. And when I came out of it, it was because everyone else was quiet, and looking at me in some alarm.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-15 09:49 pm (UTC)I have also learned that just because I can't make out what other people are saying, I don't actually have to shout for them to hear me. I find that so weird; they say something to me, I hear faint vocal sounds from which I really struggle to make meaning. I speak normally, they understand me just fine.
When there is huge background noise, I have no hope of conversing. When the background noise is deliberate, such as music so loud that if that level of noise were in a workplace everyone would be wearing ear protection, I get very dismayed and very disgruntled very quickly.
I have to wonder, though; if 20% of the population really does experience some degree of this, perhaps there is a substantial niche market who would fall over themselves in relief and gratitude to have their social evenings out in a deliberately quiet environment? I'm thinking a series of comfortably furnished lounge settings, abundant heavy curtains and wall hangings for sound deadening, slippered waiting staff silently bringing trays of drinks and snacks. No background noise of industrial-deafness inducing levels. No discombobulating flashing lights interfering with my ability to draw what I'm describing on the back of a napkin... Hmm. I can dream, can't I?
(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-15 11:14 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-16 08:18 am (UTC)What did you say?
Date: 2009-03-17 10:06 am (UTC)I too had my hearing tested. Came out fine. I didn't believe them. But then later I read something about some people having this sort of problem, in noisy environments and the like. I'd like a solution please!
-- mpp
(no subject)
Date: 2009-03-16 06:32 am (UTC)Doesn't bother me, just disinclines one towards the nightclub scene.
Labs
Date: 2009-03-17 10:10 am (UTC)-- mpp
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Date: 2009-03-17 10:12 am (UTC)Tweet Tweet
Date: 2009-03-17 10:12 am (UTC)-- mpp